Thanks for coming back by my inconsistent posting. I have had a tough time lately getting the time to sit and compose a logical thought. So today, as I sit with my coffee I'm going to share a few things that have been on my mind.
I have had a heavy heart on some topics that hit very close to home, and honestly I just can not share them right now. But at some time I hope that I can.
I find myself thinking a lot about hypocrisy, and that makes me uncomfortable and it makes me think long and hard about my life, my choices and my calling. I find myself struggling to understand all those things at the moment and honestly... I'm doing a POOR job working it out in my head and my heart. Pride has a lot to do with it as well and I am praying that I let go of pride and lay it all out on the line for God and be open to His calling on my life.
Do you have those things in your life that you are very good at and at time you know those things are to be the focus of God's calling for you?
But there are other times in our life where God tells you to put those things aside and do a new work. Sometimes the toughest part about those times in our life is the people around us. They continue to ask you to do that which you are good at, not knowing you are in a time of waiting and searching. That is where pride comes in, isn't it? Putting self aside and saying "no" because it would be easy to say "yes" and would make you "feel good" because you know the response others will have. Now, I know I've posted about singing, and this is not about that. Frankly... God got me over that prideful issue a years ago, so now I really can sing from a thankful and gracious heart.
Am I rambling or making any sense? Here is an example. You have been asked to head up a committee or do a job that you are well qualified for, you have done it in the past and had great success. You've been told, "you have to do this, people respect your opinion and you will stand for what is right."
That is all fine and good, but what if God tells you, "this is not your battle anymore and someone else most do that job." It is time to move on. WOW... that is a hard word to hear. I know there are times when it is OH SO important to stand and make your voice heard. But right now, I think the quiet absence is a much LOUDER voice in the end.
Now, how does this get me back to hypocrisy? In my heart I feel like a hypocrite if I continue to do the work He is told me not to do any longer. I'm praying for guidance, for courage and most of all peace.
Do you have issues you have like this? I'd love to hear about it.
Thanks for listening to me share my heart.